telink fence

I frequently dream of days like today, when I know, its going to be dull, rainy and gray. Im out on the street, sometimes with an umbrella, sometimes not, but its all sharp, the raindrops, the metal spokes of the broken umbrella, it usually is. its all cold, and wet, optimism fails me in a deluge more than usual, the bus comes by to pick us up, im often at the wrong place, in the wrong time, its too crowded to let me in, its too cold to call out. if im lucky it splashes water on me, if not, it doesn't. im usually not lucky in the hand me down of generations of bad luck. I dream of the window by the wall, with a hot cup of tea and a steamy romance, I frequently dream of a different reality, when I should have got in that bus, reached where it was going, struggled and fought and held on for progress, when I am just standing around bereft waiting for everything, everyone, all the time.