amnesiac

 

I forget these walls exist, even when I'm not walking through them, I forget I'm a ghost sometimes. I forget all these systems I'm dependant on, life support leaves me so cold. I forget the objects in my rear view mirror, they are farther than they appear, I forget that a hundred green sparkly hats do not a revolution make, takes one

I forget how long revolutions are, should they not have been round? I only remember some nights when I slept, others blur into negatives, stiff and dark and transparent, I forget the right filters between light and darkness. I only remember moments that demanded both and froze forever. I forget what I must remember, what I want, what I'm doing, I forget flowers that wilt away

I forget the differences between making love to a man and making love to a room, I forget that I am not free, never was, always will be, I forget that I have a date with destiny, that my hand writes only what my mind does not recall. I forget that I'm ill, old, dying, sad, happy, angry, ecstatic, undaunted and very very mad. I forget that my mirror is lying as I speak, and if I lean over, it will start speaking with me

I forget this heaven is temporary as is the next, I forget if now is to be seized or ignored or written about or forgotten. I forget where all the rulebooks are kept, are they stored together or broken into Fraunhofer lines. I forget how much I know, how little I know, I only remember how little I mean

I forget the distance between dream and reality, how small it can be, how long it takes to cross, I forget how far I walked away, before my soul elected to reveal itself